i've been pushing off this blog post for weeks now. really. it's so hard for me to even know where to start, but i have felt compelled to write this because i think a blog is probably the easiest way to tell numerous people at once.
this past year has been absolutely crazy for me. i spent a month in cambodia, a month at summer staff, was an alpha leader, studied abroad and spent four months in south africa. and now i'm here. home. in ridley. and to cut to the chase, i have made one of the biggest decisions of my life so far, and this is something i'm still processing.
a part of me doesn't want it to become a reality and the other just absolutely cannot wait for it to become a reality. i know some people already know but for those who don't, i have officially decided to transfer from azusa pacific to james madison university. JMU is in virginia. yep. not california aaand not pennsylvania. but va. i could spend five hours and explain in detail what made me decide this, how i decided it, and why, but i don't feel compelled to explain everything yet. maybe ever.
APU offered me a ton. grew me in really incredible and hard ways. definitely offered me some of the most unique opportunities i'll ever have in my life. but i know the lord has brought me to a different place in my life. and i have so much peace about it and that is the only thing that has been ringing in my heart telling me that this decision is okay. because i know this peace comes from the lord. i know, believe, and follow a god who is never changing--and it is especially comforting when i am all over the country and world.
so my plan is to live with my best friend and 7 other girls i haven't met yet but have already heard incredible things about. my other plan is to lead Young Life....and i've tried to act like i'm not passionate about this ministry. (but how far did that take me?) and sure, it seems like i have a well-thought out plan for JMU. but really i don't. i feel nervous that i have to start over. scared of not knowing the campus. confused over the fact i'm not returning to apu. but in this season of healing, i know some things for sure.... i know god wants me at a place where i can be challenged, stretched, and molded. i am so ready to do those things not only at jmu, but here at home.
i wish i could talk about everything going on in my heart and mind, but if i save it as a draft, i'll never post it, and i really need to....i already have like 3 drafts saved haaa.