Today I was eating lunch at home; alone, without my phone, without my laptop, and without music. It sounds absurd I have to clarify, but I am the first to admit I feel guilty if I am not active...in whatever. if I am not reading, talking, writing, going, doing, doing doing. so I was eating an orange and I thought to myself "How do I feel about this orange?" I want to do that more, because this question offered a lot of room for small celebrations. My answers were along the lines of, "It's absolutely delicious, and it is messy. It is bright in color, and it smells nice. It is good for me." and I could not help but continue to think about things that are good for me.
I write this in the sheer fact that I am so, SO easily prone to ALWAYS indulge and impulsively pick things that are not good for me. Yea, I am talking about sin, but I am also talking about just dumb desires or ideas of what I want and when I want it and how to get it. But how good does it feel when we pick things that are natural and innately good for us?
I wish I had discipline, and I think it is appropriate to explore in this season of Lent what it means to pick things that are good for us, even when we don't necessarily think they are a big deal, like eating an orange, and especially when we do not want to choose those things.
I certainly do not think that choosing good things means we should wallow in the ways we choose bad. Because in that case, I'd be screwed. Do you REALIZE how excited I am for 7:45 so I can go get cake batter froyo with a mountain of rainbow sprinkles, reeses chunks, and cookie dough pieces? And in a way, I think it is good for me...in the way that I get to have great conversation over it and the way I am passionate about something so dumb as to a dessert.
Also, you seriously-could-not pay me enough to stop watching Khloe & Lamar. And I'll admit, I don't know how I could even try to make a case and say that is good for me. So, yes, I choose bad things. I think that is why good things feel so powerful to me.
So what is good for you? What ignites a passion or gets your mind wandering in a peaceful manner? What brings you to the core of who the Father has created you to be? Most of the time, I choose things that are good for me in long-term ways....such as a major I am passionate for, school opportunities, and so forth. But I am more talking about what is good for you today? Remember, the present is a present. It's a gift...Where are your gifts today?
My gift was in my sweet, delicious orange. Also, in the book I am currently reading: Reaching Out by Henri Nouwen. Out of reading this book comes learning about prayer, which is good for me. Another gift is the Penguin Cafe Orchestra station I am listening to on Pandora, because it is instrumental, calming, and creates room for me to insert my own lyrics.
These are three silly things that are good for me. Which only consisted of about an hour of my day, total. Could you imagine how incredibly full my life would be if things that are good for me took up most of my day? It is not that the rest of my day was in vain; it consisted of ministry, school, cleaning, singing, a little dancing, walking. but things that are good for me on a very small scale...a VERY small scale...make me feel less cluttered and more aware of the nourishment I need everyday that pertain to me, Rebecca.
O how all good things come from You. Will you reveal to me what is good for me and give me the strength to choose so?